Death is coming

The closer death creeps up upon me the less I am able to understand the reasons for life or living.

Yes I have experienced a close family member dying and unlike television it takes decades to handle such a thing. To think I am going to put my family through such a thing when I finally leave is more horrific to me than the thought of death itself.

My life was and is still a learning experience but when all said and done what am I to do with all this accumulated learning over my lifetime if I just die. There is no logic or reason to this.

Long ago I became aware that the God story that is sold to the majority is just a nice story to give mankind with a message of a basic layout of how nice life could be if everyone followed these ideas. Not many in life do and if one thinks about it the good and evil structures actually depend on each other. The good that can be experienced in life is only understood as good when there is it's opposite to compare it to. This is not rocket science only common sense in reality. I am not saying we need to experience bad but understanding in it is needed to appreciate the great things many of us can have in our lives. From birth to death there are many ways mankind helps his fellow man. How many ways can you help?


Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Save Your Relationship After Infidelity with These Helpful Hints

By Ricardo d Argence

After infidelity, a relationship is going to be at its weakest point, but it is possible to come back from it. Infidelity is one of the major reasons that relationships fall apart, but the truth is that cheating is almost always a symptom of something bigger. As bad as cheating is, it's not what you need to focus on to restore your relationship after infidelity.

Cheating is usually a sign that the person doing the cheating is looking for something they're not getting from the relationship. This isn't saying that the partner who was cheated on is doing anything wrong, just that there is a major problem in bedrock of the relationship.

If you are going to come back after infidelity, then there are a few tips you need to follow in order to make the process as easy and effective as possible.

The first thing to do is take charge. The cheating wasn't your fault, and if you understand this upfront, your partner won't be able to use it as an excuse. They're only trying to make you feel guilty for their mistake, and they need to know this doesn't fly with you.

This will also help you to feel better about the relationship. Being cheated on makes you feel like a victim, and taking charge to repair your relationship will give you back the strength and pride that cheating took away.

It's easy to play the blame game, but it's only going to make things worse. Remember, the idea is to rebuild your relationship, and if all you do is blame one another, the situation will never be resolved. Just let this part go and you'll thank us for it later.

You'll find that this is the most difficult part on your journey to repair your relationship. However, it's also important to keep from accepting their apology. After all, if you forgive them you wouldn't be here in the first place. Then again, you don't want to fish for one either. If the relationship can be saved, they'll understand how much they hurt you.

The main goal is to figure out the real reason why. Once you can get past this point and discover the true issue, you can start taking the necessary steps to save the relationship. If you don't, it will end up failing.

When the both of you are discussing your future, it's important to have brutal honesty. Most couples have a hard time doing this because of all the emotion that is involved. However, this is part where you'll either see a glimpse of overcoming the infidelity, or having to go your separate ways. So get to the root of the problem and be ready to hear you downfalls as well.

Learn to trust again. In many ways, this is the toughest thing to do after infidelity. The trust has been broken, and it will be hard to get it back, but you need to be able to trust your partner again. No relationship has ever succeeded based on suspicion and paranoia.

In the end there are several different resources available that will help you recover from infidelity. It's hard enough to recover from a relationship, so make sure you get the appropriate help needed to make things better.

About the Author:

No comments:

Post a Comment