Death is coming

The closer death creeps up upon me the less I am able to understand the reasons for life or living.

Yes I have experienced a close family member dying and unlike television it takes decades to handle such a thing. To think I am going to put my family through such a thing when I finally leave is more horrific to me than the thought of death itself.

My life was and is still a learning experience but when all said and done what am I to do with all this accumulated learning over my lifetime if I just die. There is no logic or reason to this.

Long ago I became aware that the God story that is sold to the majority is just a nice story to give mankind with a message of a basic layout of how nice life could be if everyone followed these ideas. Not many in life do and if one thinks about it the good and evil structures actually depend on each other. The good that can be experienced in life is only understood as good when there is it's opposite to compare it to. This is not rocket science only common sense in reality. I am not saying we need to experience bad but understanding in it is needed to appreciate the great things many of us can have in our lives. From birth to death there are many ways mankind helps his fellow man. How many ways can you help?


Sunday, May 16, 2010

Does Massage Therapy Relieve Grief?

By Elaine R. Ferguson, MD

Receiving soothing massages for eight weeks after the death of a loved one can provide much-needed consolation during an intense, stressful period of grieving, according to a study in the April issue of the Journal of Clinical Nursing. Hand and foot massages can help console bereaved people, Swedish researchers have found.

The study was comprised of 18 adults from 34 to 78 who'd recently lost a loved one to cancer. They were offered a 25 minute foot or hand massage on a weekly basis for 8 weeks, and were allowed the choice of having them at work, home or in a hospital. Only three of the participants had previously received a soft tissue massage.

"Details about the massage study were included in an information pack provided by the palliative care team when people's relatives died," says lead author Dr Berit S Cronfalk from the Stockholms Sjukhem Foundation, a Swedish palliative care provider.

"Soft tissue massage is gentle, but firm" explains Dr Cronfalk, who carried out the research with colleagues from the Karolinska Institutet. "This activates touch receptors which then release oxytocin, a hormone known for its positive effects on well-being and relaxation.

"In this study the hand or foot massage was done with slow strokes, light pressure and circling movements using oil, lightly scented with citrus or hawthorn.

"The relatives were then encouraged to relax for a further 30 minutes."

Baseline data was collected on the participants during a 60-minute interview before the program started and a further 60-minute interview was conducted a week after the massage program finished.

The interviews with the participants, which have been published in the Journal's annual complementary therapy issue, showed that they derived considerable benefits from the program.

Nine participants chose foot massage, eight chose hand massage, and one had both types of massages. Only three had previously received a soft-tissue massage.

A follow-up six to eight months after the study showed that 17 of the relatives had moved forward with their lives, but one had suffered further emotional problems after the death of another close family member.

"All the people we spoke to used the word consolation" says Dr Cronfalk.

"The massages provide physical touch and closeness and helped to diminish the feelings of empty space and loneliness that people felt."

"Study participants also told us that the massages helped them to balance the need to grieve and the need to adapt to life after the loss of their relative.

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The Unfairness Of Life - Is It Really Unfair?

By Ace C. Erin

The Book of Job is one of the most beautiful books in the entire Bible and a favorite of existentialists the world over, even people who don't believe strongly in the supernatural. For the Book of Job is just about the one most puzzling question that anyone that has ever lived is bound to have wondered: Why is life unfair?

Job, according to the parable, was a holy servant of God who was perfect in his obedience of divine laws. Yet one day he starts experiencing a series of increasingly catastrophic events, from the loss of his property to the loss of his family to the loss of his health. He's puzzled, for in a just world with an all-powerful all-loving God who is both just and merciful, none of it makes any sense whatsoever .

And so his friends and neighbours try to console him, till they also can only imagine that Job must have done some terrible evil, to which he's not admitting, for which he is being so ruthlessly punished.

Finally in his frustration Job can stand it no longer and instead of simply trusting in God cries out to God, almost accusing Him of bad faith. Job is at his wits' end and nearly at the end of his faith, it might appear, when God finally answers not Job's questions over why God has permitted all this anguish, but answers rhetorically with challenge after challenge along the lines of where-were-you-when-I-created-the-world, fundamentally pronouncing, Who are you to judge me?

In this story we will be able to see the futility of inquiring after life's fundamental unfairness. For what appears unfair to us is just a part of a larger natural activity that just happens to inconvenience us, oftentimes seriously, even fatally.

But it's not private and maybe that is the most bitter moral of all, that such things happen without any reference in the slightest to our individual selves, which is to assert, our egos.

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