Death is coming

The closer death creeps up upon me the less I am able to understand the reasons for life or living.

Yes I have experienced a close family member dying and unlike television it takes decades to handle such a thing. To think I am going to put my family through such a thing when I finally leave is more horrific to me than the thought of death itself.

My life was and is still a learning experience but when all said and done what am I to do with all this accumulated learning over my lifetime if I just die. There is no logic or reason to this.

Long ago I became aware that the God story that is sold to the majority is just a nice story to give mankind with a message of a basic layout of how nice life could be if everyone followed these ideas. Not many in life do and if one thinks about it the good and evil structures actually depend on each other. The good that can be experienced in life is only understood as good when there is it's opposite to compare it to. This is not rocket science only common sense in reality. I am not saying we need to experience bad but understanding in it is needed to appreciate the great things many of us can have in our lives. From birth to death there are many ways mankind helps his fellow man. How many ways can you help?


Sunday, September 26, 2010

How To Overcome Grief And Loss With Psychotherapy

By Tara Cronin

Sometime in our lives, we all undergo a loss which is especially challenging to manage. Irrespective of whether the loss is the passing away of a relative, good friend, or pet, or the loss of something really important to us, say, for example, a business, house, or family heirloom, grief is really a healthy and normal reaction.

Grief is definitely a personal experience and involves various sensations and emotions, from panic and denial, to culpability, anger, loneliness, and sorrow. An array of problems can lead to grief, like the loss of a business, a separation, or an unexpected accident or ailment. Nevertheless, just about the most difficult loss anybody is ever going to face is probably the demise of someone we love, such as a partner, child, or parent.

The loss of somebody, or even something, we adore dearly is usually devastating. It feels like the whole world ought to stop and take notice of what's happened. Yet life appears to continue on all around us oblivious, as our personal existence comes crashing to a standstill.

While the natural grieving process does take time -- often several weeks to several months -- if you or someone you know finds that the grief just won't seem to go away, or that it worsens over time, professional assistance may be required. No matter the cause, if left unaddressed all grief can turn into severe depression and result in other psychological disorders.

How can grief counseling help?

It is not unusual for people to ask, "Just how can grief counseling possibly help? It will not bring back the individual we lost."

Although any person struggling with grief will ultimately come to terms with their loss and integrate it into their life, the emotional assistance and understanding provided by an expert counselor or therapist can help make this process much less hurtful or devastating.

Just as we are all unique individuals, no two people endure grief and loss or resolve the loneliness in a similar way. Grief counseling is focused on coming together with the one who is troubled.

Grief therapy is not about lessening your loss. Instead, grief counselors provide understanding and support as you deal with, and traverse, the process of picturing living life devoid of the loved one you lost.

Because everyone grieves differently, numerous grief counseling techniques exist. People often find it helpful to find ways to symbolize their loss and create ways to positively remember their loved one going forward. Some popular grief therapy techniques for doing so include:

Writing Therapy -- Writing exercises can help resolve feelings such as guilt, anger, or sadness. These exercises can include writing a "good-bye" letter to the deceased and keeping a journal or using creative writing to help resolve any issues that are making the grief process more difficult.

Art Therapy -- Creative expression, like for example making a scrapbook, painting, drawing, or sculpture which celebrates the life of the dead person, can help people who are having issues articulating their grief utilizing words alone. Poetry and music can also be a good way for handling despair.

Conversations with the Dead -- Facilitating a "conversation" between the person who's lamenting and the lost loved one can be an extremely effective therapeutic method that offers a chance to communicate anything that was left unspoken at the time of passing.

While moving through the various stages of grief is rarely easy, this movement is essential to being able to resume your life and incorporate your loss in a healthy manner.

Grief counseling and therapy will not only allow you to move through the process of grieving, it will also help you address whatever unresolved issues in life that make the grief process harder.

Ultimately, grief counseling can help you recover a sense of purpose, find inner peace, and rediscover joy in life that honors the memory of the one you lost while allowing you to move forward with confidence and optimism.

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