Death is coming

The closer death creeps up upon me the less I am able to understand the reasons for life or living.

Yes I have experienced a close family member dying and unlike television it takes decades to handle such a thing. To think I am going to put my family through such a thing when I finally leave is more horrific to me than the thought of death itself.

My life was and is still a learning experience but when all said and done what am I to do with all this accumulated learning over my lifetime if I just die. There is no logic or reason to this.

Long ago I became aware that the God story that is sold to the majority is just a nice story to give mankind with a message of a basic layout of how nice life could be if everyone followed these ideas. Not many in life do and if one thinks about it the good and evil structures actually depend on each other. The good that can be experienced in life is only understood as good when there is it's opposite to compare it to. This is not rocket science only common sense in reality. I am not saying we need to experience bad but understanding in it is needed to appreciate the great things many of us can have in our lives. From birth to death there are many ways mankind helps his fellow man. How many ways can you help?


Sunday, November 25, 2012

Death: The Inevitable End

By Helen Marquez


As we live, we nosh death. Death is the apparent end that every individual is destined to experience. According to the world-famous Japanese writer, Haruki Murakami, death is not the opposite of life but innate part of it. It is a truth that we can't change. So when we experience a death of relative, friend, family member, colleague or a loved-one it creates a painful impact in our lives. The kind of pain and sorrow that's too deep, neither sincerity nor kindness can cure. Nevertheless, we don't have an option but to undergo the process and learn something from it. Bereavement is a natural process that allows us to reflect and ultimately be at peace enough to go on with life.

A Swiss American psychiatric specialist, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross started several researches about near death experiences, death and bereavement and she came up with the well-known "Five Stages of Grief". She defined that there are 5 basic stages of grief however, a person who is grieving does not necessarily go through all the stages nor in specific order.

DABDA is the generally known acronym of the five stages. Letter D stands for denial. It is the temporary defence mechanism which can be either unconscious or conscious. Letter A stands for anger. This stage is characterised by a strong feeling of envy and rage, wherein the person blames himself or others to release the tension he's experiencing. Letter B stands for bargaining. This stage involves the feeling of hope that it's possible to negotiate or postpone on the passing. Letter D is for for depression. This is the phase wherein the loss is recognised and the person starts to grieve and cry accompanied by distress, doubts and fear. Finally, letter A stands for acceptance, wherein the individual begins to accept the reality and tries to begin a new life without the loved-one who departed.

As human beings, we have high regards our loved-ones, in connection to that, we perform a funeral ceremony to remember the life of the person who passed away. In the Merlion City, Funeral Service Singapore offers a comprehensive coverage and concern regarding the culture, beliefs, religion and practices of the departed. In fact, funeral services in Singapore reveres the religion of departed individuals by providing customs and belief sensitive rites such as Buddhist, Taoist, Christian or Catholic funeral rites services.

Undoubtedly, losing a loved one is one of the most distressing moments a person can experience. It's emotionally, physically, mentally and spiritually overwhelming not to mention that whilst going through this overwhelming course you're expected to prepare for the departed's funeral ceremonies.




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