Death is coming

The closer death creeps up upon me the less I am able to understand the reasons for life or living.

Yes I have experienced a close family member dying and unlike television it takes decades to handle such a thing. To think I am going to put my family through such a thing when I finally leave is more horrific to me than the thought of death itself.

My life was and is still a learning experience but when all said and done what am I to do with all this accumulated learning over my lifetime if I just die. There is no logic or reason to this.

Long ago I became aware that the God story that is sold to the majority is just a nice story to give mankind with a message of a basic layout of how nice life could be if everyone followed these ideas. Not many in life do and if one thinks about it the good and evil structures actually depend on each other. The good that can be experienced in life is only understood as good when there is it's opposite to compare it to. This is not rocket science only common sense in reality. I am not saying we need to experience bad but understanding in it is needed to appreciate the great things many of us can have in our lives. From birth to death there are many ways mankind helps his fellow man. How many ways can you help?


Monday, December 24, 2012

Discover the secret to more time than you ever wanted

By Andy Jensen


We have an age old problem, don't we? We never seem to have enough time. Time is an essential resource that governs everything we do. We consider time so fundamental that we assign its measurement to sophisticated atomic clocks. Yet though we're well into the 21st century, we still have no effective means to save, store or extend it. Time ticks away, whether we like it or not, until our precious reservoir runs dry. Then, life as we know it, is over.

How can something as pleasant as life, be ruled by something as cruel as time? The Bible says time is not a mistake. In fact, God considered it to be ideal, in the beginning. Most of us recall the words that, "In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth" (Genesis 1:1). God designated the beginning as the point at which he set up everything in heaven and on earth. From that point onwards, time existed. God went on to establish light, the universe, fish, birds, animals, and of course us. When he reviewed everything, "God saw all that he had made, and it was very good" (Genesis 1:31). The key here is that "very good" in ancient Hebrew means things were perfect. So nothing needed any improvement. Not even time.

So when did things fall apart? Not long after the creation. By then, "the Lord God had planted a garden in the east, in Eden; and there he put the man he had formed" (Genesis 2:8). Sadly, Adam refused to live according to God's instructions. As a consequence, "the Lord God banished him from the Garden of Eden to work the ground from which he had been taken" (Genesis 3:23). But things soon became much worse! God said "Cursed is the ground because of you; ... it will produce thorns and thistles for you" (Genesis 3:17, 18) Even today this curse adversely affects everything we do. Outside of God's care in his perfect garden, work efforts are hindered. God says, "By the sweat of your brow you will eat your food until you return to the ground, since from it you were taken; for dust you are and to dust you will return." (Genesis 3:19). Things are difficult now. We cannot get as much done. Everything is hard work. Finally, death awaits us when time runs out.

Thankfully, that is not the whole story. God plans to restore his universe to its former glory. Because of his great love for us, he wants us there with him. He has already sent Jesus to start the rescue. Jesus lived and died and rose to life again, in full and final payment for mankind's rebellion. As a result, our original friendship with God can be restored. Take a moment to read about it in Romans chapter 5. Soon, in a remarkable way, God will use the thing we fear the most, death, to bring new life. Just as we pass away, this present heaven and earth has an expiry date. John saw in a vision there will be "a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away" (Revelation 21:1). Just as there is an afterlife for us, a perfect new heaven and new earth will rise from the ashes too, but this time without the curse.

What implications are there for time? Will it affect things in heaven? Will we even do anything in heaven? The Bible says, "we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do" (Ephesians 2:10). Now nothing says we cease to be God's workmanship or stop doing marvellous works when we reach heaven. But everything will be hugely different. For the first time, unhindered by the curse, we'll experience the pleasure of wholesome and rewarding accomplishment. Imagine the satisfaction of unrestrainedly completing all we seek to achieve. Teamwork will be a delight, unimpeded by glitches and poor communication. Individual responsibilities will freely benefit from our full and passionate attention. Perhaps we'll be able to deliver extravagantly like the master craftsmen and women of old.

Surely, welcome news like that is widely received and understood, right? Actually, many misunderstand the importance of time to God and his universe. A common quote is "With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day." (2 Peter 3:8). This does not indicate time to be irrelevant. Instead it reveals God's patience and decisiveness. He doesn't want anyone to perish, yet can still be trusted to deliver judgment day. It's not a description of what we can expect in the new earth. Not surprisingly there is someone with a vested interest in confusing the issue. Try as he might to ignore it, the devil is scheduled to be "thrown into the lake of burning sulfur ... for ever and ever" (Revelation 20:10). He will leave no stone unturned to mislead us into believing eternity is a timeless wasteland. Because without time, just about everything we understand would be unbearable. For example, what if nothing had a beginning? Imagine never attending another party or concert because nothing ever started. Imagine never meeting a new friend. Or worse, what if nothing ever ended? Imagine a life playing a harp (pick your pleasure), forever. Time allows for fresh beginnings and change. Time itself is not the enemy.

What is time like in heaven? Much like it is now, only without limitations. The Bible has many references that show how time operates. First, John records that, "there was silence in heaven for about half an hour" (Revelation 8:1). Half an hour is a period of time. Also, the martyrs "called out in a loud voice, "How long, Sovereign Lord, holy and true, until you judge the inhabitants of the earth and avenge our blood?" ... and they were told to wait a little longer" (Revelation 6:10-11). The requirement to wait presumes a finish time. That point is reached upon announcement in heaven that, "the time to reap has come, for the harvest of the earth is ripe" (Revelation 14:14). For a more concrete reference to time, we need only consider the description of the tree of life. It produces "twelve crops of fruit, yielding its fruit every month" (Revelation 22:2). Our future paradise clearly operates by a regular and timely schedule. We can look forward to a comforting and dependable rhythm of life.

The answer to not having enough time is clear. Eternity will provide a rich and inexhaustible supply. Though life here is spoiled and thwarted by the curse, life in the new earth will provide an abundance of opportunity, success and fulfillment. We'll finally have time to shine.




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Sunday, December 23, 2012

Funeral Pre-Planning Steps And Benefits

By Hillary Mason


Most individuals map out their future. They plan where to go for college, which company to work for right after graduation and even how to live their life after retirement. Seemingly, people plan for almost everything in their life. However, there is one thing that they usually fail to prepare for - their funeral. This is quite understandable given that death is not something most people don't think about. Also, pre-planning one's funeral can truly make one uneasy.

However, as death is inevitable, accomplishing this task is necessary. Moreover, taking care of this matter as early as possible can spare the departed person's loved ones from future stress. They can just concentrate on grieving and remembering the life of the departed. Pre-planning a funeral can also lift a huge financial burden off the shoulders of the deceased individual's family.

So, how can a person pre-plan his/her funeral? Basically, the first step for this task is to locate funeral services Singapore providers that offer funeral pre-planning. Of course, to receive the best service, one has to ensure that he/she picks a highly recommended Funeral parlour Singapore has. To accomplish this quickly, one can ask trusted people for recommendations. Another option is to utilise the Internet for more extensive results.

Following the selection of funeral pre-planning service provider is the preparation for the actual funeral. This is the stage where discussions about the funeral details with the funeral director happen. The goal of this stage is actually to iron out details of the funeral.

Some of the important matters that need to be decided are the type of casket to be used, the venue of the funeral service and the kind of ceremony to be done. Deciding on these matters may be difficult given one's limited knowledge about them. But there is no reason to worry! Again, during this process, the funeral director was around to give advices or suggestions which can help one come up with the finest decision.

Once the main points of the funeral are fixed, what needs to be done next is to make a copy of the plan and inform loved ones about it. After this, one can solely focus on saving and paying for the bill.




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Saturday, December 22, 2012

All That One Needs To Know About New Jersey Bereavement Counseling

By Brandi Little


The loss of a loved one is a harrowing experience. Those left behind go through a pendulum of emotions. The experience is distressing and this makes it hard for the individual to cope with it. The best way to deal with it is through the help of New Jersey bereavement counseling. This will enable the individual to deal with this loss in a healthy way.

The inability to deal with grief is very dangerous. It takes an emotional toll on individuals. As this happens, individuals have their own various means by which they cope with the bereavement and grief. This means, however, are not suitable. Most keep their emotions to themselves and crowd themselves in work or other activities. This will eat them from the inside making an emotional meltdown imminent. They therefore need to take care of this through counseling.

After the suffering of a loss, individuals have many options by which they can receive support. Among the options is to participate in, group counseling sessions and support groups. These groups offer lessons on grief and loss. They also teach on how to deal with them. Additionally the presence of individuals who have undergone the same experience makes it easy to share, as they all understand each other pain.

It is common for some individuals to feel uncomfortable sharing in groups. This is understandable as most people feel the need to grieve on their own as they come to terms with what happened. To such, an individual professional counselor would be of great help. The confidentiality offered is appealing to the individual. This step will help them heal and learn to accept the loss as part of life. Ultimately, it leads to their recovery allowing them to resume life.

An individual recovery is dependent on the professionalism displayed by the therapist. This calls for the therapist to display compassion towards the individual. Such individuals are fragile, as the loss they have suffered has caused them a great deal of emotional pain. This compassion makes them feel wanted and loved contributing to the healing process.

The process has been identified and broken down into five steps. However, individuals are unique. This makes these steps unique too as they do not have a necessary order by which they occur. Professionals are best equipped to handle grieving individuals, as they know exactly how to take every step.

Anger is a byproduct of the grieving process. This anger if not checked could be disastrous to an individual well being. It is common for people to feel helpless, this helplessness turns into anger as they ponder on the things that they could have done to save the individual or to have made their time on earth a bit better. This leads to heavy regret, regret that causes emotional distress. This distress could turn suicidal hence the need for professional help.

Professionals in New Jersey bereavement counseling are certified therapists. They have undergone the necessary training to ensure that they offer the best of care and service to those bereaved. In addition to this, it also allows them to deal with situations appropriately.




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With Grief Counseling NJ People Can Learn To Cope

By Brandi Little


When a tragic event occurs where lives are lost or a person becomes traumatized by the event, one of the things that should be available is grief counseling NJ residents can go to. This helps people sort out their feelings and come to terms with what has happened. Even if coming to terms means accepting that someone dearly was loved. In the meantime as a friend or caring person these are some things you can do to help someone who is grieving.

A person who is grieving needs to be able to express everything that they are feeling. This means that they could be happy one minute and crying the next. They may also express anger or even rage while they are talking and sorting out their feelings. The best thing you could do for them is to simply listen to them while they do this.

Let them know they have your full attention. Most people are able to read body language, and you want yours to truly make them feel like your attention is to them. While avoiding hugging them, lean close and simply focus on them. Give them eye contact once in a while, but do not stay staring at all times. Staring at all times may make them a bit uncomfortable and make them hold back on their feelings.

You want to avoid any body movement which can seem as though you are not paying attention, or that you feel uncomfortable with what they are saying. This can make the person shut down emotionally if they feel you are becoming uncomfortable with what their thoughts. Fidgeting or a lot of movement of leg can feel as though you are uncomfortable. Constantly looking at your watch will also feel as though you are anxious to leave.

Do not be quick to give an opinion about what they are feeling. Do not try and interpret anything that they are telling you. Simply allow this time to express what they are feeling so that they can sort all of the emotions they are experiencing.

When someone who has experienced a tragedy, people feel the need to say something to try to make the grieving person feel better. Usually people say phrases that say things are going to be alright, or that you understand what they are going through. These common sayings do not have any positive effect on the person who is grieving.

Unless you have truly experience the exact same situation, then you cannot truly understand what they are feeling or going through. Even if you have gone through a similar situation, keep in mind that it affects people in different ways. Therefore it may not be possible that you truly understand what they are going through.

After a loved one passes on or a tragedy happens emotions tend to be heightened. This is why it is important to help a loved one cope with the situation. The best thing for them is to seek grief counseling NJ area has available. A professional can help them accept and cope with the tragedy that occurred.




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Saturday, December 15, 2012

Death And Loss: The Stages Of Grieving

By Albert Arce


As we live, we nurture death. Death is the inevitable end that every person is destined to experience. According to the famous Japanese writer, Haruki Murakami, death is not the opposite of life but an innate part of it. It is a truth that we can't change. So when we go through a death of relative, friend, family member, colleague or a loved one it creates a painful impact in our lives. The kind of sorrow and pain that's too deep, neither genuineness nor kindness can cure. Nonetheless, we do not have an option but to go through the process and learn something from it. Grieving is a an inherent process that allows us to reflect and ultimately be at peace enough to go on.

A Swiss American psychiatrist, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross started several studies about near death experiences, death and dying and she came up with the well-known "Five Stages of Grief". She explained that there are 5 fundamental stages of bereavement however, a person who is grieving does not necessarily go through all the stages nor in particular order.

DABDA is the generally known acronym of the five stages. Letter D stands for denial. It's the brief defence mechanism which can be either unconscious or conscious. Letter A stands for anger. This stage is characterised by a strong emotion of rage and envy, wherein the individual blames himself or other people to release the tension he's experiencing. Letter B stands for bargaining. This stage involves the feeling of hope that it's possible to negotiate or postpone on the loss. Letter D stands for depression. This is the phase wherein the loss is recognised and the person starts to grieve and cry accompanied by sorrow, doubts and fear. Lastly, letter A stands for acceptance, wherein the person begins to accept the truth and attempts to begin a new life without the person who departed.

As humans, we have high regards our loved-ones, in connection to that, we conduct a funeral ceremony to remember the life of the individual who departed. In the Merlion City, funeral service Singapore offers a comprehensive services and concern regarding the culture, beliefs, practices and religion of the dead. In fact, funeral services in Singapore reveres the religion of dead individuals by providing belief and customs sensitive rites such as Buddhist, Taoist, Catholic or Christian funeral services.

There is no question that losing a loved one is indeed a roller coaster of emotions. It is physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually draining, not to mention the stresses of planning for a funeral ceremony. Today, funeral services in Singapore are equipped to provide decent peaceful funeral services. Most of the companies are pretty helpful and empathetic during these bereavement moments.




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Thursday, December 13, 2012

How To Pick The Best Provider Of Funeral Prearrangements

By Cindy Ingram


A decent and beautiful funeral service is what relatives would want to give their deceased loved one. It might sound simple, but making this happen can be extremely challenging given their emotional state. Moreover, when they spearhead the planning of the funeral service, family members become subjected to more stress.

Would you like your family to have the same fate? Certainly, you would say no. Therefore, start doing something to save them from the stress of planning your funeral. Make funeral arrangements ahead of time!

If you reside in Singapore, making this happen shouldn't be difficult with the presence of numerous companies providing funeral prearrangements. While finding a funeral and Casket services Singapore provider isn't difficult, you should not pick one without knowing their services and products. Simply put, do research before you choose!

When pre-planning a funeral, it'd be best to get the services of a funeral company that offers a wide range of products and services. Doing this alleviates the need to deal with many suppliers and the stress that goes along with it.

Since one of the major parts of funeral pre-planning is selecting a casket, it's imperative that you check the casket selection of the funeral services provider. As much as possible, pick a company that has a vast selection of caskets. This is to make sure that you would obtain one that fits your preference and your budget. Meanwhile, if you plan to have a customised casket, be sure you choose a provider of Singapore casket services that does personalisation.

However, it isn't enough that a funeral services Singapore provider has a large collection of caskets. Its products must also be elegantly crafted and most importantly, durable. So, don't fail to examine the caskets of these funeral services providers. Find out what others have to say about their products, too. Typically, high quality caskets are associated with trustworthy funeral services providers.

Pre-planning your funeral may make you uneasy. But trust that making funeral arrangements ahead of time is probably one of the best decisions you can make for yourself and your family. By doing this, you allow your loved ones to grieve without further worries, and you ensure that you get the funeral service you want.




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Benefits Of Learning Wake Etiquette

By Timothy Sanders


At a time of loss, things can be very painful to handle. The right words and the right actions don't seem to come out natural, particularly when people are overwhelmed by depression. When you're a friend or a distant member of the bereaved family, you should make it a point to pay respect to the departed in the most respectful manner. Making a visitation or going to a wake, even for a few minutes, can let them know that you are willing to give them support.

When you make a visitation however, you must be aware of proper wake etiquette. Understanding what to do and what not to do lessens your chances of appearing disrespectful and offending the bereaved family members. Here are some reminders that you must know during a visitation:

Wear only dark coloured clothes. Wearing dark clothing allows you to express emotions of grief. Avoid utilising light colored clothes because they denote joy. Wearing these clothes may offend the bereaved family, as these light coloured ensembles may convey inappropriate intention to celebrate.

Don't be loud. Naturally talkative people ought to be careful of how they socialise during a wake. Unlike ordinary conversations, they should keep their voices and energy to a minimum. Why would you want to overwhelm the mourning family with your loud voice? Although seeing old friends while making a visitation is entertaining, be sure to stick to your goal: that is to remain sorrowful of the event.

Remember to pay respect to the bereaved family all the time. In the event that death pervades your family too, you are sure that they'll give you the respect that you deserve. If a sudden death hits your family, contact a Singapore funeral parlour services provider straight away. Such Funeral parlour Singapore provider can help you surmount the struggles brought by death in a stress-free manner.




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